011 Stay the Course
Overcoming Depression — Staying the Course Through Failure and Faith
Episode 11 | Featuring Michael Cirillo | listen in your favorite podcast app | Watch on Youtube
Overcoming Depression: Why You Need to "Stay the Course" Through Failure
We often look at successful entrepreneurs and assume their path was a straight line to the top. We see the wins, the companies, and the accolades. We rarely see the "dumpster fire" seasons that forged them.
In Episode 11 of the Optimizing Beyond Podcast, I sat down with Michael Cirillo, host of The Dealer Playbook and CEO of FlexDealer. Michael is a powerhouse in the automotive marketing industry, but his story isn't just about business strategy. It’s about survival.
We dove deep into his seven-year battle with depression, the power of response versus reaction, and the specific mindset shifts required to pull yourself out of the darkness.
Here are the critical takeaways from our conversation on resilience, faith, and staying the course.
The Innovation of Desperation
Michael’s resilience is in his DNA. He shared the story of his father, who lost everything in 1982—money, reputation, hope. In a moment of total desperation, his father didn't give up; he went to a pawn shop, bought a typewriter, and manually typed out phone numbers all night to build a competitor to the Yellow Pages from scratch.
The lesson? Innovation often requires failure. As Michael put it, "There is no innovation without failure and problem and hardship. It's those things that actually push us to innovate.”
If you are eating "crap" right now — in the middle of a major challenge, embrace it. That struggle is refining you. It is strengthening you for the wins that are coming later.
Reaction vs. Response
One of the most powerful distinctions Michael made was the difference between a reaction and a response.
Reaction is instinctual. If someone kicks you in the shin, you react immediately with pain or anger.
Response is intentional. It requires you to internalize what happened, think through the next action, and then act.
When Michael was in the thick of his depression, he experienced paralysis—a lack of reaction entirely. Moving forward required him to stop reacting to his circumstances and start building a "response plan.” You can actually pre-meditate how you will handle chaos before it arrives.
The "Vitals Check" Strategy
We often wait for a miracle to pull us out of a hole. We want the instant healing. But Michael shared a profound reframe on faith and agency.
When he feels overwhelmed, he runs a "Vitals Check":
"Do my hands work? Do my feet work? Is my heart pumping blood? Does my brain work?"
If the answer is yes, then you already have the blessing. You have the faculties required to take action. As Michael said, "Faith is a principle of action.” The miracle isn't always the removal of the mountain; sometimes, it's the strength given to your hands to climb it.
The Willingness Audit (Try This)
If you feel stuck and don't know where to start, Michael suggested a brutal but effective exercise. Grab a piece of paper and do this:
Draw a line down the middle.
Left Side: Rate your Willingness to Learn on a scale of 1–10.
Right Side: Rate your Willingness to Take Action on a scale of 1–10.
Most people rate themselves as a 10 on both. But here is the catch:
Write down the one thing in your life you think you cannot live without (e.g., your phone, video games, comfort, coffee).
Now, ask yourself: Are you willing to give that thing up to get to where you want to go?.
Suddenly, those 10s drop to 5s. You have to make room for the new life you want, and that requires sacrifice. You can’t optimize your life if you are clinging to the things that distract you.
Stay the Course
When I asked Michael what he would tell his 20-year-old self, his answer was simple: "Stay the course.”
You are already the "future you" in an incubator. The challenges aren't going to disappear, but you are being built to handle them. Whether you are in a season of depression, financial struggle, or just grinding it out—don't bail.
Daily anything changes everything.
If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health, this episode is a must-listen.
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